Hey there, fellow parents whose hearts are about to be shattered into 2.5 trillion pieces because the first child to leave your nest is about to take wing!

Dramatic? Lmao, I don’t think so. Our family’s been getting ready for this momentous event for about six months now as Rider, our second oldest kidling, is getting ready to move out and we have been GOING THROUGH IT!!!

Saying goodbye to the first to fly the coop as he ventures into the big wide world has been a powerful mix of emotions. Excitement, pride, and a twinge of sadness all rolled into one. It's okay to let those feelings flow, beloveds. In fact, it's crucial to be present with them. So grab a box of tissues and a pint of ice cream (my fave is Haagen Dazs coffee) and let's dive into some tips for coping with this new chapter.

1. Acknowledge and Express Your Emotions (Yes, Even the Ugly Cry)

First and foremost, embrace those emotions! Shed a tear, wail in the shower, or laugh-sob into your pillow. Whatever helps you process this transition, do it. It's okay to feel a little lost and mourn the changes.

Towards the end of last winter, I noticed our fam was in a bit of a funk. I couldn’t quite put my finger on what was going on.

Then our daughter, MJ, who was probably the funkiest at that time, tbh, said she didn’t want to ask Rider about something because he wasn’t going to be there anyway for her to rely on and BOOM!!! I collided with the elephant in the room. 

Robert and I called the kids together that night and named what was happening. That everyone’s vibes seemed off and we thought it was because all of us were processing Rider’s announcement that he was going to be moving out. But each of us was doing it alone. And we needed to be together.

The floodgates opened and we wept together. All of us. For a while. There was nothing to change, we just needed to be with the hard.

So if this kind of hard is happening for you? Take your time to let it all out. Do it with your own beloveds if you can. And remember that moving forward doesn't mean forgetting the past.

2. Establish New Routines (Awkward Dancing May Ensue)

I imagine the first night after Rider moves might feel like a game of musical chairs, but instead of music, it's just awkward silence. When the music stops, we may be left with an off-kilter family who needs to learn new dance routines minus one troop member.

So we’ve already started changing things up.

Dinner every night together used to be something we insisted on. For YEARS. 

Now, with our kids having other pressing demands, we don’t always get to have that and so we’ve established cooking both new and old recipes and eating meals at separate times with different configurations of family members. 

And whether we’re together or apart, with our cooking video keepsakes, all of us have access to how to make our family favorites. 

Already it’s given us lovely opportunities to connect in different ways to each other.

Try and identify your own groovy new routines to dance to as your family goes through this big change.

3. Maintain Connection (Because Spamming Them with Texts Won't Cut It)

Despite the distance, your child will always be a part of your heart – and your cell phone plan, let's be real. But maintaining a genuine connection goes beyond the occasional "how r u?" text message. 

Schedule regular video calls, send surprise care packages, or start a shared online album to keep each other updated on life's adventures.

Our family created a side hustle for our kids we’re excited to work on together. (Deets coming soon!) I’m super geeked about it because it’s going to mean consistent communication and connection with Rider and our other children when they move on. WINNING!!!

Remember, a strong relationship is built on love and a solid Wi-Fi connection.

4. Foster Your Own Identity (Empty Nest, Fun Quest)

Now that you have maybe just a leeeettle more time and space, it's your turn to spread your wings and rediscover who you are outside of the parent role. Remember all those dreams you put on hold while raising a family? 

Well, beloveds, it's time to dust them off and give them some serious attention.

As you can see, with Kith & Kinship, my husband and I are business-building. And while we love being parents, we love this facet of our lives now, too!

Pursue your passions, travel, or simply enjoy the little things in life without constantly checking the clock. Trust me, you deserve it!

5. Savor the Past (Outsmart the Emotional Avalanche of Your First Child Leaving Home with Good Ol' Photos and Videos)

Picture this: a room filled with tear-stained tissues, sad songs playing softly in the background, and a parent clutching their smartphone like it's the last slice of pizza. Yep, we're talking about the moment Rider leaves home.

This is gonna be me. I know it. I find myself thinking, “Where did the time go? Wasn't it just yesterday when they were drawing stick figures with spaghetti hair?" 

When I really need to just let myself be whole-heartedly nostalgic, I turn to all the pictures and videos we took to capture priceless memories.

These visual time capsules transport us back to a time when life was simple and our kids were tiny tornadoes of cuteness. 

Because, let's face it, parenting is a wild ride, and sometimes all we need is a little digital time travel to bring us back to the days when bedtime stories and fruit snacks were the solutions to all of life's problems. 

And there you have it! A little guide to help you cope as your first child spreads their wings and soars into independence. 

Remember, it's a bittersweet journey, and it's okay to feel all the feels. Embrace this new chapter, nurture yourself, and always keep that love-filled nest warm for when they fly back home to roost.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go pick up my pompoms to cheer and celebrate Rider entering his new phase of life. Even if I have to surreptitiously wipe away a tear or two when I do it. 

From my heart to yours.